We've been receiving compliments from friends for our relationship. People have been seeing us a great couple, natural, talented, and other good definitions.
And it troubles me, everytime.
And it troubles me, everytime.
It seems to be an understatement to say "yes, there are some rocky roads, some arguments, but we can go through them all!" (Or insert here anything you have heard others say when they are asked, "how's your relationship going?")
And it troubles us because they seem to overlook the core of what's really happening in our relationship, it reduces the battle to only a sort of.. "struggle". And we hate it. We hate for us to be seen as strong, as perfect couple, as whatever people see from the outside, from our pictures. We hate it because it does us injustice for what we have been battling with. We hate it because at the end of our journey, people will never see the glory and the beauty in the evil face of suffering, of depression. And the hope for people like timo, for those who cut themselves, for those who go through sleepless night hating themselves and life, or for those who are suicidal.
And it troubles us because they seem to overlook the core of what's really happening in our relationship, it reduces the battle to only a sort of.. "struggle". And we hate it. We hate for us to be seen as strong, as perfect couple, as whatever people see from the outside, from our pictures. We hate it because it does us injustice for what we have been battling with. We hate it because at the end of our journey, people will never see the glory and the beauty in the evil face of suffering, of depression. And the hope for people like timo, for those who cut themselves, for those who go through sleepless night hating themselves and life, or for those who are suicidal.
Depression has been understated and has been reduced to nothing more than just a 'stress'. I was one of those people, thinking that they are weakling, that depression isn't real it's just in your head. And i still find many who think of depression as something to be hidden, or those who ignorantly and easily say "it will be for your good." Worse, people who think that depression must have something to do for not having a "good relationship with GOD"! Imagine how furious we are. And i've had enough.
So, i want to raise the curtain, with honesty, how our journey has been. With hope, for ignorant people to understand a bit - this is said with anger. And with hope, to reach and tell those of you out there who feel unloved, who feel meaningless, who feel the pain of loss, who hate themselves, who question GOD, who question their existency, who are tormented with comparison, those who are depressed - this is said in compassion and love. We cry with you.
Our ultimate hope, for you to know, there is hope of being alive, for there is the Faithful One.
Our ultimate hope, for you to know, there is hope of being alive, for there is the Faithful One.
note : to see Timo's repainted version, go to his instagram acc @gratimocious.
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